An old photo album.

Yesterday, when I went to the living room to check the door, I noticed an old book, wrapped up poorly in an nilon bag. I opened and surprised of those photos that I’ve never seen before. Maybe because I’m much closer to the father-family than the mother’s family like any typical Asian family does. ( In Vietnamese they call the father’s family is ” internal” family, and mother’s family is ” external” family as male-contempt has been deep into the subconscious of Asian country. Sure now they’re open their minds but not their actions. For example, a woman who lost her virginity is normal, no problems, but they demand the woman who they marry must be a virgin. How ridiculous. )

Eh? Am I degressing? Sorry for that. I can talk for hours about feminine rights.

Actually sometimes I want to keep virgin until marriage. See, I’m an example too. Can’t get out of prejudice. *slap myself*

So this is the cover, made of woods, with oil painting- Oil painting on wood( I’m not sure it’s called like this  because I don’t know much about art and craft so I just translate directly) The surface was polished and reflects the light so I tilted it.
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This little picture describe a popular landscape of Southern Vietnam. People travel mostly by boat.

We even have ” floating market” like this

Inside the photo album, there is two seperated pictures in the left.

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The smallest is my grandma and grandpa. He passed away since my mom was only 6. The largest is my grandma. I can say that she has not changed much, still that gentle smile as she is. The rest are some relatives and their friends, I guess.

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Every page except the first is covered by this transparent paper, let’s look closer, it’s spider web pattern. To evoke the old feelings right?

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And this is my grandma with uncle
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…and with both children, my mom and him

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No offend, but his face makes me want to laugh. And my mom’s face is pretty as she is always, but this one looks a little grumpy.

and some others aunts and uncles, and I realize that the woman in the back is my great grandma.She passed away five years ago, I have not much memories of her but remember the times when I visited her, I felt peace.
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This must be my grandpa at somewhere. I can’t figure out.

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And this some photos of him in the next page.
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He was a university lecturer, the job that always has chance to visit foreign country. But around 1970s, Vietnam was quite close to Soviet Union, and I think he was in Russia, or somewhere in the Soviet Union at that time.

Another trip to China, at Tiananmen Square.

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My grandma with some sisters. There is 3 large pictures at different pages. Maybe it’s a shot that she likes best so she sticked them on.
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Her two sisters. They look alike each other O_O

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And look this vintage style which is now trending again.

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The polaroid photo. My mom and my uncle. They look really reluctant. Lol.
I wonder why I don’t look like her *_* She is way more prettier than me, said an old vietnamese idiom ” Peacock mom, owl daughter” *_*

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I’m interested in the cover…I will find a photo album with the same type!
Bamboos, and boats…

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What a nostalgic feeling…

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” Tango da Napoli a Buenos Aires” – Tango from Napoli to Buenos Aires.

Today is not a good day for me. The suspended trip, got scolded for unknown reason and many things more…

But the jazz concert tonight relieved me. I went with my friend. She is studying at Italian department so we got the ticket at cheaper price than normal. This concert was held by Italian Ambassador. 

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The artist are pianist Pino Jodice and accordionist/pianist Giuliana Soscia. I’m still impressed with her red dress. One more thing is the Steinway & Son piano, and the last is Hanoi Opera House. I’ll never stop being impressed by the architecture designed by French while they were here 100 years ago. The opera house was built in 1911, with the capacity of 500 people. Quite small.

Though I don’t listen to jazz much, so it’s a bit hard for me to enjoy the music completely. But by far, it was a great concert. The techniques of the two artists and one Vietnamese saxophonist Quyen Thien Dac is excellent. I think the best part of the concert was Villanella / Tarantella di Cenerentola- based on the ” Gatta Cenerentola”. Some pieces which was composed by G. Soscia is also interesting, like Passaggio del Delfini and Migration. 
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Setlist was being introduced.

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Performance. My camera is not good enough :-<

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Handmade pen container.

 I was bored today, waiting for the test tomorrow. 

Mom bought me 2 cans of condensed milk last week, after using I suddenly wanted to keep it, though I didn’t know what to do with it yet until today, I found an ole notebook that I used to write many different things while I was in high school. After reviewing, I think it’s no use keeping it anymore so …

Here are the cans:

 

 

I just peel the label off then realize that no need to do that..=”=

Yeah, my handwriting was bad at that time, if I want to catch up with the teacher’s speed. Well, at the begining of 12th class, I turned from an excellent student into bad, in writing, and concentrating at class, but still high grades. Those were the days…Literature, Maths, English, Physics, Chemistry, History, all in one. Haha. 

 

And I take the cover of this notebook off. It was beautiful so I just can’t throw it away >< Just peel it off the thick cover. It is made of artifical leather, a thin layer of thin cloth, and a little of glue with little sparkling beads.

 

Shiny..~ You can call me tengu I like shiny thing and silver jeweleries.

Cut this into 2 pieces that fits the cans, it was easy…

 

Next I will use glue to stick them together, but this kind of glue is hardly has effect on this surface so I use tape at the tips. 

And this glue, it is commonly used in industrial work. I don’t remember the ingredients because I threw its box immediately after buying lol, but I know for sure that it is toxic. Let one drop pour in your skin and.. you will wait for days then it peels off itself. Or you can peel it, and scream in agony. Its smell is also annoying. Worse than onions, not only make your tear drops,  but can harm your lungs. It’s useful, no one can deny, but I wonder if it’s in children’s reach… too bad. Better keep it safely.

 

I edit some of the photos included in this post, but why my hand …=”= I have dark skin but it’s not as this. 

 

 

 

The last step was so obvious, just use that dangerous glue (lol) stick them, and now I have two shiny pen container, they’re simply but unique…Want one? lol

 

 

Well, I think this is the first time I write something…normal *yaoming face* but it’s quite relaxing…

Alone at home.

I stayed up late, one more time, last night. I read the score of opus2 ( Vivaldi) while fingering silently and then, bam, it’s 2.44.am. Why time goes so fast?

Maybe I’m too idle recently.

With nothing to do, I start to rummage my memories, more than ever before, even while driving, yes, it’s dangerous, but I’m out of control and don’t know how to stop. 

I remember many things.

I remember the days when my mom carried me on her back and went across the street. 

Those scenes are haunting me.

Me and my cousin, playing on the yard, hold the colorful chalks and drew distorted figures on the ground.

The ancient gate, red bricks, the smell of moss on the wall with letter written by paints: ” unstable wall”

It’s still there, the only thing that left while all has changed, and…disappeared. 

 

I know, when the memories keep appearing in our minds, and then we drown in, daydreaming with regret, and that we want to go back… that’s when we’re about to run away from reality, because the fear of tomorrow, fear of future. 

 

Two years ago, time to prepare for university exam, it’s a decisive, and the most important exam of life.

I didn’t fall like this. I kept calm and handle all, with stillness. 

How did it all come to this?

Hope this will end soon.

She said

” T chết vì m mất, tại sao cs của m cứ gắn liền với những thứ chẳng đáng tin nthế. M nghĩ xem, giá như m đừng có vướng vào những chuyện như thế, t nghĩ cs m đã khác đi rất nhiều. Thực sự thì có lẽ giờ gặp thì t cũng khác ngày xưa, nhưng mà t biết m là người tốt, có lẽ do cuộc sống hay cái cách suy nghĩ của m hơi lệch lạc. Nhưng mà tao mong là m sẽ bắt đầu suy nghĩ khác đi. Cũng chẳng phải tao có cách nhìn đa chiều, tao gặp nhiều người giống m rồi. M sợ cô đơn và sợ bị lu mờ trong cái cuộc sống này nên m muốn được tỏa sáng, được mọi người để ý. T nói với m thế này thôi, m đừng theo đuổi những thứ xa hoa phù phiếm. Nó chẳng mang cho mày niềm hạnh phúc trọn vẹn, niềm vui nhất thời chẳng là gì khi phía sau là nỗi nhục nhã ê chề. Vì thế m nên biết cái gì nên nói và không nên, cái gì tốt và không tốt. Lớn rồi, 20 tuổi, thực ra, t nói thật, m sống vừa ích kỉ lại có sự nuông chiều bản thân quá lớn. M không có dự định gì cả, m chỉ có những tham vọng về những thứ không phù hợp vs m. Nếu m có dự định, m nói đi, m có thể cho t biết kế hoạch chi tiết của m về cuộc sống không? Dù chỉ đơn giản là ngày mai làm gì, làm gì để một ngày trôi qua không hề lãng phí? M biết không, không phải t quá tự tin đâu, nhưng ngày mai t biết t làm gì, thậm chí tối nay t biết t làm gì. Nói thật, không phải vì m từng là bạn t thì t chẳng hy sinh một buổi tối làm việc của mình vì m, thế nên t hy vọng m đừng phụ tao… M nên quý cái mà m có, khi nó mất đi rồi chẳng ai cho lại được. Bố mẹ m rồi cũng già yếu, cũng bỏ m bơ vơ thôi. Không phải m cứ tìm thứ ở nơi xa vời mà bỏ quên những thứ trước mắt, m bị ảo tưởng thì đúng hơn. M nên biết m là ai, m là cái gì. T hy vọng m sẽ tốt lên mỗi ngày. M cứ hy vọng mà m chẳng làm gì. Không dưng ai dễ đem phần đến cho mày đâu. Nói chung m cứ sống tốt đi.. Nó không phải hy vọng mà là một giấc mơ chẳng bao giờ có thể thành hiện thực. ..”